This article, as the raw draft, inspired my light-hearted newsletter piece titled 'Mastering the Art of Complaining: How to Secure What You Deserve in an Unequal World.'
Carolina Almeida, a philosopher, internationalist, and political scientist, shared that as children, they are raised with the understanding that the farther they are away from Blackness, the greater the person they are going to be.
She says, “So, identifying as a Black woman or as a Black man in Brazil is a great step, actually a great social and, also, emotional step to be achieved, because we are constantly being persuaded by everything around us that being Black is bad, it’s ugly, it’s not interesting.”
Geledés: How Afro-Brazilians are combatting racism.
Earlier tonight, Dr. V and I decided to go out spontaneously for dinner in Boston. At the first restaurant, the hostess, polite but prim, told us the wait would be about an hour. Fair enough, it was busy. At the second restaurant, something felt off. The hostess, looking somewhat wary, directed us to the bar, insisting there were no available tables—even though several were clearly open. We weren’t the customers they wanted. Rather than argue, we left.
At the third restaurant, we were seated immediately—no questions, no hesitation—by a cheerful, welcoming hostess. It was only later that I realized the difference. The hostesses at the first two restaurants had both been white, while the one who seated us without issue was Asian American. The contrast was undeniable, and the pattern became clear: access was subtly controlled based on how we were perceived. It reflected how colorism works—quietly but unmistakably shaping who is welcomed and who is turned away.
I’ve written before about experiencing subtle discrimination in Boston. And while I’m usually one to complain when things are off, I didn’t make a fuss this time (I understand how these situations can escalate, and confronting the second hostess wouldn’t have ended well, she would have brooked no dissent over her dictactes). Plus, honestly, I can’t get too worked up about food in the U.S. These days, something just feels wrong about the ingredients, and the value-for-money equation is off, especially in New England’s food scene, which I’ve covered before.
Earlier, while I was trying to buy sunglasses, I noticed two Persian girls nearby, also browsing and chatting in Farsi. Even though they had likely only been in the U.S. for a few years, I could see they were already fitting into the “ethnic white” category. Despite sharing the same cultural heritage (I’m fluent in Farsi), it felt like we were on different sides of the ethno-cultural divide.
Continue reading “Fully Booked”: How Colorism Shapes Who Gets In